'Glad cats are your deal breaker': Boyfriend Refuses to Confine His Cats to One Room to Live with His Allergic Girlfriend, She Wants Her Dogs to Roam Free, and the Two Blow up on Each Other in a Heated Text Exchange

Author image for Mariel Ruvinsky
Mariel Ruvinsky • Writer and Editor
Nov 19, 2024 9:00 AM EST

To us, as people who love cats, the thought of our future significant other having one… is a good thing. We would love for our boyfriend or girlfriend to come with a complimentary cat. It's like winning the lottery twice. But we know that not everyone thinks that. Seriously, we have read some ridiculous stories over our time here. Stories about partners not being able to handle being 'second' to the cat because of their fragile egos, to partners asking their girlfriends to choose between them and the cat, all the way to one boyfriend calling his girlfriend unhygienic because of the cat that she sometimes kisses on the forehead. 

Some people just don't get it. And the couple in this thread definitely doesn't get it. Now, this one is not quite as black and white as the other ones, and we truly would like to hear your opinion about it. What would you have done in their situation?

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  • 01
    I wish I didn't have allergies but unfortunately I do. And I can't stand animal hair either. Reason why I have dogs that don't shed. We've always had dogs that don't shed my whole life. I just can't do it. Not having cats roaming the house or in our bed or in anywhere I sit or walk around and be miserable in my own home. I just wanna know you understand and care Or if it's a deal breaker say it As long as dogs don't roam the house either R u serious right now Yes, equality
    via Anusha Barwa, anushabarwa

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    r/AmlOverreacting ⚫3 days ago rukahs7 AIO Cats relationship Context is I have 2 cats that I love, who have been with me at my lowest. Early in the relationship we talked about this and settled on my cats having their own space. She's visited me multiple times and she'd get sniffly but never eyes puffy. I thought about having their own space somewhere they wouldn't come across her space since she is allergic.
    via rukahs7

    Look… our first reaction when reading through this caption (which was written by the boyfriend) was to be on the boyfriend's side. How could his girlfriend, after everything that has said, go back on her words and ask him to get rid of his cats, right? But that's not exactly what happened.

  • 03
    The roommate I am with now doesn't clean as much as I do but it's not as terrible as she made it seem either. I recognize that my retaliation using her dogs by saying that it "should be equal", and "I hate dogs" is wrong but I was angry and was trying to make a point. This went completely left after I said I wanted to give my cats a floor (my man cave).
    via rukahs7

    After reading through the thread in full and taking it all in, we think that our conclusion is just that… some people are not meant to be together. The conversation was contentious from the beginning from both sides, and it continued that way throughout. We think neither of them is truly wrong, just that they should not be together. What do you guys think?

  • 04
    AIO into thinking that they shouldn't be confined to a room. They are coming from having free roam in an entire house and are super happy. I'm already upset that I'd have to separate them from the 2 friends they have made with my roommate's 2 cats.
    via rukahs7
  • 05
    Are you being serious.... I just thought we talked about this. But I need you to understand the severity of it. I'm not living in my own home sneezing all the time. You said a separate room they'd stay in. Not roaming the house I don't think you understand how allergies work I wish I didn't have allergies but unfortunately I do. And I can't stand animal hair either. Reason why I have dogs that don't shed. We've always had dogs that don't shed my whole life. I just can't do it. Not having cats ro
    via rukahs7
  • 06
    You'd just wanna be spiteful. Bc I have allergies and don't wanna be sneezing miserable. But if your cats can shed all over the house walk the counters and have hair everywhere my dogs can't? lol We'll have a separate floor but I'll be in that floor So that'll be the deal breaker Wow That's what we settled on Why even be with me if you would rather stay on a floor with cars than me No we didn't Trying to act like you'd just be down there Yes we did We said they'd be in a separate floor Like my d
    via rukahs7
  • 07
    Not gonna have a whole floor of a house just to designate it to cats you said a down stairs room You're not going to have a whole house for your dogs If you're already gonna act like we'd be roommates bc of cats then say it How is that fair? They'll have a floor which will be my manage Ok my dogs don't she'd. Don't walk on counters and have hair everywhere and make you sneeze where you can't breath Man cave K Glad cats are your deal breaker like your just live on another floor because of them +
    via rukahs7
  • 08
    Man cave will be a whole floor, you can have the floor everyone walks in and sees Just trying to make me her now. Where we're roommates and stay down and get covered in cat hair and track it upstairs to us I'll come to bed of course but I'm going to be in my man cave Marry your cats then. Since they matter Yeah treat me just like her Not looking for a roommate Who says I'll be a roommate Wanna actually be with and live with the person I love Bc your saying she just like the what you do now Just
    via rukahs7
  • 09
    Yeah be laid up with cats and leave me on another floor and track the sh upstairs where we can't even cuddle and making me sneeze and just go to bed Now you acting over board Not interested in someone trying to play tit for tat. Cats. Affect my breathing. And allergies. Eyes and throat will swell shut. But wanna be like oh your dogs..... Itll be clean, its what vacuums are for smh Ok yeah just like your house now Covered In cat hair. They walk where you walk eat Well if your cats are more import
    via rukahs7
  • 10
    My dogs don't affect anyone's health But you don't care about that They affect my mental health Wow You're unreal Enjoy your home and cats. Live there then since they are what matters. Not your family and having a home and babies and being married and living a life we want They can't be confined to a room that is animal cruelty I'm going to have a man cave even if I didn't have cats Stay where you're at or have your own house one day. I won't live in a house with cat hair and dander being transf
    via rukahs7
  • 11
    You don't take it serious at all Okay say no more You don't take anything serious either You don't care how allergic I am Expect me to just drop my children like a pos Never said that. No not happening, I wouldn't dare do that to anyone That's up and selfish No one said that so quit running with the bulls They'd have their own floor and I'd clean it and change clothes if I had to I'm going to have a man cave and my cats aren't being confined to 1 room That's up to ask that, + animal cruelty Sure
    via rukahs7
  • 12
    Sure. Till I'm not home and let them up there bc you don't take my health serious. Or coming up stairs anyways with cat hair all over you making me miserable Ok CHANGE CLOTHES because I do care Well I found a house and thought it may be feasible to rent together but since your guess it's not cats need a whole floor Stay with your roommate bc of your cats Okay Ok My children will never give me an ultimatum No one is Been with me through thick and thin something you're not willing to do You run wi
    via rukahs7
  • 13
    I don't need to be with a animal cruelty person I'm not willing to have breathing issues but apparently my health isn't important to you You're so dramatic no one said anything about animal cruelty You will run with anything I swear + up It is which is why I was willing to change and keep clean but you're dramatic Keeping animals to one room is animal cruelty Ok I give it 24 hours of being in the house and you'll see. Since my health is a joke Wanna care about my health any other way until it co
    via rukahs7
  • 14
    10:48 100 Qi have cats and my patner is allergic, hie can we live togetjer Yes, it's possible to live together even if your partner is allergic to your cats, but it will require careful management with strategies like designated cat-free zones, regular cleaning with HEPA filters, and potentially allergy medication for your partner to minimize their exposure and symptoms; open communication and compromise are key to successfully navigating this situation. Key points to consider: Allergy managemen
    via rukahs7
  • 15
    then my health doesn't matter to you HEPA filters, and potentially allergy medication for your partner to minimize their exposure and symptoms; open communication and compromise are key to successfully navigating this situation. Key points to consider: Allergy management: • Dedicated cat-free zones: Designate specific areas in the house, like your partner's bedroom, as completely cat-free to provide allergy relief. HEPA air purifiers: Invest in high-quality HEPA air purifiers to filter out cat d
    via rukahs7
  • 16
    Regular cleaning: Thoroughly vacuum and dust frequently, especially in high-traffic areas, using a vacuum with a HEPA filter. Wash bedding often: Regularly wash pet bedding, blankets, and curtains to remove allergens. Cat management: · Limit access: Keep cats out of your partner's bedroom and other designated cat-free 70000 You working. In school tired. Yeah. Those cats will be nasty hair everywhere and you won't do nothing You can screenshot all day. It's what you actually do. Not what the inte
    via rukahs7
  • 17
    peoriagrace 3d ago You two are incompatible. ✩ 4.1K
    via peoriagrace
  • 18
    Stui3G 3d ago You spelt insufferable wrong. 693
    via Stui3G
  • 19
    seaclifftonne 3d ago Top 10% Commenter Insufferable convo 2.2K
    via seaclifftonne
  • 20
    OkFaithlessness3638 • 3d ago I'm extremely allergic to cats and yeah you guys are not a fit, because looks like neither wants to compromise 1.2K
    via OkFaithlessness3638
  • 21
    glamazon_69 3d ago • You're both not realistic and trying to find a solution that doesn't exist. Break up! 850
    via glamazon_69
  • 22
    ACanWontAttitude • 3d ago • Top 10% Commenter You sound like an absolute child MAN CAVE MY MAN CAVE ✰ 657
    via ACanWontAttitude
  • 23
    Preacherman1508 • 3d ago Neither of you are mature enough to be in an adult relationship. But ultimately it's okay for you to want cats and for her to not want cats. You are both allowed to have boundaries. It just makes you not compatible. That is okay 634 ...
    via Preacherman1508

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boyfriend cat dogs break up relationships girlfriend reddit thread Cats
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